Near Misses

So last night (October 21) the Iredell House (the intentional community I am a part of - I have a link for it, check it out) had a party. This isn't so unusual, but this time we had this incredible band show up. I wanted to give them a not-so-shameless promotion. They are called the Near Misses, and they are incredible. I've put a link to their website up on this page. Check them out. Their song "This is Your Day" is my personal favorite. I've decided to rename it "Song of St. Paul". It's not really about Paul, but I like to think it is. Anyway, keep an eye out for this quintet of ladies.

Aha...I Think

So, there are moments when it all seems to come together. Take today for instance. I had found myself deep inside that oft-forgotten realm of ill-conceived theological formularies. I think it's safe to say that I was is a slough of dispond called Thomas Aquinas. Now I don't want to be too harsh on St. Thomas. After all, his work is still forming the Church in her practice and faith today. That, too, is an understament. Yet, I, even I, was having difficulty making sense of Thomas's Trinitarian doctrines. So, there I sat in class, with little to go on except that "Aquinas is very Trinitarian. How, why, and to what extent. What is the difference between procession and mission?" Very good questions. My response? I don't have a damn clue. Then suddenly, the roof of 110 Gray was suddenly ripped off. Lo, the throne of the Most High stood upon the great seat of the Church (and by this I mean Duke Divinity School. Eat that Yale). Surrounding the throne were myriads upon myriads and thousands upon thousands of seraphim who chanted unceasingly, "Aquinas and Augustine are exactly the same. Their hermeneutics are just differnt. Aquinas understands that the processions in the Godhead have been revealed to us by means of their mission. Processions in se; Mission economic." Well, I must say, at first I was stunned that angels could chant this so clearly and without stuttering even once. But then I realized, "Aha! Mission is in time, procession is in eternity." Ok, so why is this important, you ask? Good question. My answer? I don't have a damn clue. Well, at least I feel like St. Thomas and I had a real moment of bonding.

Donnie Darko: Deterministic or Optimistic?

So my good friend Bo and I disagree about this movie. Now I don't want to suggest that I have "figured it out." After all, I've only seen it once, and the website has got me baffled. But, still, I think calling it deterministic is way too easy. There are too many layers, too much going on for it to be simply a weird convulsion of Calvinism. I think that's just a poor read. I find the film much more optimistic than this. Though I will submit that there is a peculiar stoic thread running through its course. After all, at the end, as Donnie sits on his car roof looking out over the valley with his dead girlfriend in the car and the world seemingly about to come to an end, he laughs. He laughs. It is a detachment from the reality of life. He's achieved that mood, that sensual space where he can be (literally) above all that is happening and has happened. I thank my good friend Bud for pointing this out. Yet, I can't help but think that this film is about a search for possibilities, not submission to a pre-determined course. No one forced his hand. I do not want to play the "free will" card, because I think that, too, is not the point. Perhaps, in the end, it is rather Wesleyan. There is a reality before you. Take it or leave it, but know that one is the better of the two in which you are not free to be as you choose, but to be as you are appointed. Go and do, not because you can but because your will has been subsumed into a far great schema. It is not free will, but a will freed from the constraints of this ill-percieved world and enslaved in the will the the Other (capital "O" very intentional). So, Donnie is merely traveling toward his supernatural end, namely, a will freed from the fear of his (and everyone else's) natural end. At first, I did not think too much about the issue of "fear" in reference to this film. Patrick Swayze's character (the self-help guru) speaks about "fear" as a force that keeps everone from reaching their full potential which is love. Strickly speaking, this isn't necesseraly a bad idea. However, his failing is in his suggestion that one must dive into oneself to find the answer to fear - to find love. He uses the imagery of the "mirror." He says that you must look through this mirror, at and through yourself to truly "see" who you are. Well, obviously Donnie disagrees. So do I. You see, you cannot find yourself "in" yourself. That's the problem - every living creature dies alone. That's the conflict of the film - finding the alternative to being alone. The point is not to find the alternative to death - that is natural. Perhaps even dying alone is natural (though I'm not entirely convinced), but our supernatural end is in the Other, to whom Donnie submits. Release from fear is in this Other, not in oneself. Throughout the film, we see how "empty" the lives of all the characters are (particularly Donnie's family). So, love is not supremely found by seeing onself deeply. No, to truly see oneself deeply is to find, ultimately, an emptiness, an incompleteness. That is fear. Supreme love is in the Other, to whom we are being drawn unto. Finally, and I think this is just kind of cool, there are two mirror-symbols in the film. First is Patrick Swayze's talk about seeing oneself in the mirror. The second is when Donnie is in the bathroom taking his "medication" and finds the force field that separates himself from Frank the giant bunny. Obviously these are allusions to Alice in Through the Looking Glass. In the former case, one is challenged to go through the mirror to find truth. Yet, as we all know, the other side of the mirror is not reality, but a distorted perception of reality. We oftentimes see what we want to see, but never do we see perfectly what is on the other side. In the latter case, Donnie cannot cross this "mirror". He cannot go there. The point here is that the other side is forbidden precisely because it is not true. We do not see rightly through the mirror. We only see distortion, confusion, and fear. Donnie's search for truth never takes him "through the looking glass."

What's Up With That

So, there's this strange phenomenon, I'm finding, in which we unwittingly try to pray for things that ought not to be prayed for. Example: "If you would please turn your attention to the list of prayer concerns...Let us all keep in mind the terrible earthquake in Pakistan. I think that it goes without saying that we should pray for the earthquake and all the victims in Pakistan." Hmmm. Now if you're not careful, you might just pass by that seemingly harmless statement. But wait! "Pray for the earthquake." What kind of freakin' earthquake is this that it needs our prayers? It's like that old WWF wrestler... you know, the one who was named after some technical earthquake term, like "Richter" or "Seismic". He was a big fat dude who's great wrestling move was sitting on people. Anyway, if it's this guy we need to pray for, I can dig that. I mean, really, he obviously needs to loose weight, maybe even get a real job. But, alas, we pray for a natural disaster. And I wonder what this means, even? "Oh, God. We pray for this earthquake (whom we now name Schmitty) that he will continue in strength and ferosity. May your Spirit guide and uphold Schmitty under the shadow of thy most holy wings. En nome Patri et Filiis et Spiritus Sanctus. Amen." Well, anyway, at least we don't really name earthquakes like we do hurricanes. Can you imagine those conversations. "Hey, Bob. You know what today is, doncha? Yeah, it's the anniversary of the day Mable opened up the earth and swallowed my family into the depths of Sheol. Yeah, sucks." Anyway, I do pray for all of the victims of the earthquakes in Pakistan and Guatamala. May the Church be true to her calling.

What's My Problem!

Ok, so it's been several months since I updated this blog. What can I say, I've been busy. Yeah, you heard me...busy! What, I can't have a life outside the internet? So, here's been my life since last I posted. Went to Belize, almost died...twice. Finished my work in Oklahoma, sad to leave. Back in North Carolina at Duke Divinity School. Oh, yes, Duke. I hear the Divinity School dodge ball team is back to kicking ass. Injuries so far: One broken toe, one damaged knee. No broken arms this year...yet. Already at mid-term. It's Reading Week. Screw you Law School! Oh, yeah. We get a full week. I bet Yale doesn't even get a full week. So far I've gotten zero work done, unless you count re-cataloging my comic books and getting in half a season of Cheap Seats. I bought some classic and soon-to-be classic DVD's the other day to help give me more excuses not to study. These gems are: The Lost Boys (you heard me. The 80's vampire great starring Kiefer Sutherland and both the Corey's), Suicide Kings (you know, the one with Christopher Walken...he's my boy!), and last year's great, Hero, starring Jet Li as a confused but determined Chinese assassin in ancient (yes) China. We thank Quentin Tarrentino for bringing the last one to us, and we thank Target for putting it on sell for only $10 (yea Captialism!). Well, other than all this (it's a lot isn't it?) here I sit with nothing to do but wait until it's time for me and my more interesting friends to go bowling at 8:00. Yes, people still bowl. I mean, really, what do you do when you're a Divinity Student. Can't go about picking up the hookers. Can't get drunk (well, that's not really true - just ask my good friend Bud). Can't go off shootin' up on this or that drunk of fancy. Nope, all we got is bowling. That...or actually study. The hell with that. I can dig bad nochoes and Billy Ray Cyrus look-a-likes. Well, that's about enough, I suppose.