Bible in One Hand; Remote Control in the Other

So TV has come back into my life. We were seperated for quite a while, trying out new things...you know, just taking a break from each other. I was pretty happy without TV, but you know how TV is; just can't seem to live without me. I figured, hell, give it a couple weeks and see if we still love each other. Well, I don't want to sound all sentimental, but I think I'm going to ask TV to stay.

I've rediscovered a couple things since I got cable again. First, "Cheap Seats" is brilliant. I love this show. If you've never watched this show regularly, then you should be pistol wipped. Second, there's this new show on FX (otherwise know as soft-core for primetime) called "It's Always Sunny in Philidelphia." Wow. Just wow. This show is wrong in many ways. I would never recommend it to my parishioners (well, most of them anyway). But it's a very intelligent show. Demented, but intelligent (3 and 3-quarter stars). Finally, I get to watch reruns of Futurama every night. This is one of the top three greatest cartoon shows of all time. I hear that's it's coming back. We should all be so lucky to have TV in our lives (I can just see the faces on my former Iredell housemates).

Kal-El is Ka-Razy!

Superman Returns. I give it 3 and a quarter stars. The acting was generally good. I like that guy who played Lois Lane's husband (he's from Oklahoma you know). I really liked how they spliced in footage from Marlon Brando's performance of Jor-El from the original movie. Kind of creepy, though. It's kind of like TuPac. Anyway, it was a decent take on an seemingly tired character. But, I will say with confidence that I enjoyed the movie. One question, however. So, uh...Superman and Lois had a kid together (shock. surprise). It's not so shocking if you saw the love scene (well...assumed sex, anyway) in Superman II. It makes sense that Lois may have gotten knocked up at that point. But, still...um, how do I put this? Ok, so Superman is so strong that he literally carried an entire island into space. That's pretty strong. It's almost a kind of strength that one could...easily loose control of. So, fine. He had sex with Lois. Big deal. But Lois should be dead, right? He should have shot right through her! (Lord I hope none of my parishioners read this). It's not a new question, sure. I know I'm not the first guy to wonder. But, ok, he is Superman, so maybe he has crazy control over himself. Anyway, besides that...well done film. I liked Kevin Spacey as Lex Luthor, although...well it's a movie thing. The movies never really treated Lex Luthor like the comics. In the movies he's almost an insane comic relief to Superman's ever-serious boy scout-ness. So Spacey was well in line with Gene Hackman's interpretation. Still, the Luther as billionaire business giant (he's the epitomy of Big Business) or even as a mad scientist bent on ruling the world (a part of his character that kindly disappeared by the 1980's), the movies never really treat these aspects too seriously. The special effects were great, and I even enjoyed all of the allusions to Jesus (I, even I, thought it was thought provoking). It kind of reminded me of Mark Waid's "Kingdom Come,"this god complex that comes with being earth's mightiest hero. Of course, I think that there was something a bit shady going on with the telling of this story. Now, this is just me, but, the thing about Superman is that he was always the best of the best. This is classic DC storytelling, right, that the hero will always triumph over evil because the hero is the embodiment of all that is good, right, and moral. The hero is the archtype of the (dare I say) superman. It's German triumphalism. The heroes of Marvel, however, were different. As Stan Lee is constantly saying, "They have flaws." Even Captain America, big boy scout that he is, has a flaw - he is a man out of time. Anyway, my point is that in this Superman movie, the writers took a cue from the Marvel universe and decided that Superman needed to have real flaws to his character. He can't (literally) get the girl this time. What's Superman without Lois Lane? Also, there's this thing about him abandoning the people of earth for five years. He has this internal struggle about what his responsibilities are to humanity. The only thing missing was them jacking the classic Spiderman line "with great power comes great responsibility". I'm not at all pissed about this raping of the Marvel paradigm, because I think it makes Superman more interesting a character all around. But, still, I wonder where it came from. Okay, that's enough about that. Superman Returns. Liked it. Go see it.

My Kingdom for a Super Target!

Well, it's officially official. I have successfully completed seminary and moved back to God's country. The only thing is, I was pretty sure God's country was in Oklahoma, I just didn't know it was the Oklahoma Panhandle. Sigh. Yet, there are more glorious things to be had out here in the desert. I am now the Associate Pastor of Victory Memorial United Methodist Church. That's right. I'm now Reverend Barry Bennett. Life isn't so bad out here in No Man's Land (no seriously). I have a sweet parsonage, a nice office, a great staff (even a secretary!), and lest we forget, a regular salary. Ah, the love of God! Oh, to grace, how great a debtor! And betwixed them thou hast diedst for...oh, hell, I don't know what I'm saying. But really, it is an amazing thing that this God I serve would be so foolish as to choose someone like me for his Church. I can't really explain why, but I am certainly grateful. And to all ye naysayers out there, yes, life in the parish is pretty good. It's busy and demanding, but it's rewarding. I have learned in these past two months of ministry, one must laugh at life. As one of my duties at the church is handling emergency assistance (utilities, food, clothing, etc.), I have been engaged with the true brokenness of humanity. Finding hope in the midst of despair is part of what I do. And, because of this, I must laugh. To that end, I think I will start publishing my "quote of the week". I must be careful, however, that I do not get myself in trouble. The last thing I need is a parishioner calling me up angry because I posted for all the world to see some random funny thought of theirs. But, I'll chance it at least this once. So here it is: the quote of the week.

"I like Yoda. He's a good guy."

Classic.

It's a Divine Life

So here's my thought: facutly jazzercise. I mean, really. Wouldn't that be hilarious? Duke Divinity faculty jazzercising. Just the thought makes me laugh. Or better yet...faculty super hero personas. I suggest a five member team of earth's mightiest super scholars. David Steinmetz is "The Tecnocrat". He has a super intellect far beyond that of normal, old senile men...and his walker converts into various cool futuristic type of tools and weapons. Stanley Hauerwas is "Tex". He's just basically the asshole that everybody loves to hate and hates to love (and he can fly). Elen Davis is "Sister Shalom" (also the token woman). She can conjur up all kinds of Old Testament fury, like pillars of fire and lighting and thunder (though generally only in close proximity to mountains) and other wrath of God stuff. Willie Jennings is "Rampage" - basically your run-of-the-mill super strength, super invulnerability, with an attitude sort of hero. Finally, we round out the team with "The Padre" (also known as Warren Smith). He's got kickin' hand to hand combat skills, but also super advanced armor that gives him the ability to fire energy beams from his fists. Together, this team of super scholars fights evil (process theology, gnostics, Bowser) and oppression (Yale) whenever threats arrise.

Ok, so that's about as nerdy as it gets. It's late, and I'm tired, so whatever.